Proof that I've lost my mind--

or "how to embarass and kick yourself at the same time."

Remember I took last Friday afternoon off to get a haircut? And I went to TLC and to the grocery store. Okay, that was Friday. Today at lunch, I went over to Lowe's and was just walking around the Garden Center, catching my breath. Work has been insane to the point that I'm seriously thinking the stress is going to cause me to keel over at any minute, so I thought this would be a nice outing for me--some fresh air, pretty plants, you get the picture.

Of course I found a couple of things that I wanted. I hesitated getting them at first but decided it wasn't that much money, so it was okay--I deserved a little somethin', right? I had to wait in line forever because they only had one cashier and people were buying two and three cartfuls of stuff at a time. So when I finally get up to the register, the cashier rang me up--$29-something. I swiped my debit card, did my thing, and it declined. He cashier said he'd had some problems with debit cards so please run it through as a credit card. I did that--same result. "Let me give you a check." He ran the check--"I have to call." By that point I didn't give a damn any more, and I took my check and left. I was so mad that I wasn't even embarassed. I couldn't figure out what in the world was wrong other than running all those same account numbers through several times had voided the transaction, so I didn't really worry about it. It was the stupid cashier's fault, anyway.

On the way home tonight, I thought I'd stop and get some cash so I could go back and get the stuff tomorrow, but I decided to call the bank and find out my balance. Something just didn't seem right. So I'm driving down Northwest Expressway, one of the busiest streets in OKC, during rush hour calling the bank, and I hear I have $20-something in the bank and I'm overdrawn.

All of a sudden I'm in a panic.

OMG, how could I have spent my entire paycheck in five days? Not a chance--I spent a lot, but not THAT much.

You know, my boss disappeared from the office early today--damn it, they didn't pay us last week, and I'm screwed. Rent is due on Monday, and I don't have it. I'm gonna be tossed out on my ear!

Somebody has gotten my debit card number and taken all my money!

I've finally gotten screwed by PayPal!

Am I really this stupid?!?!?!?!?!? (no commments, please)

And on and on . . . .

By the time I got home, I could barely breathe. I ran upstairs, booted up the computer, looked at my deposit slip from work, and noted the deposit date was 3/16.

I looked at the calendar--and looked at it again.

Payday wasn't last Friday--it's THIS Friday.

Oh my sweet heavenly lord . . . .

I need a keeper (and some good blood pressure meds--145/82.)

I've never been so happy to be overdrawn.